Here is another update on what’s going on with me currently.
So far my position as Media Coordinator has expired. I have accomplished the standard requirements for the program. This means I’m out of the job, voluntarily. I didn’t extend my position because of how exhausted I felt withholding it. I was divided between two different mental streams of thought at the end. One was to focus on my passion, the other to focus on what was told. I did extraordinary efforts to keep the work space fresh. The boss just isn’t really a graphic design guy as I noticed at the later days. Clearly he is focused on film and video and that he completely missed the boat on last school year. He wasn’t even certified to be teaching digital graphics to the students but had more video experience than George Lucas and Steven Spielberg combined! But see, that was the hidden life message: Go for what you love and know and teach it.
So my divide in animation and graphic design was pulling me away from content work of my own. I really tried to mix it in the lab with the students, but most were not interested and my boss was mostly pushing for a common ground to get more students in the club. Of course I showcased my games at the end, letting both my bosses that I’m THAT valuable, but the direction wasn’t clear for game development because of the expectations of the students, which I clearly learned the hard way trying to pitch it to them.
The sad truth of the matter is the very establishment of education at English specifically with the lack of an art class in their schedule. A high rate of students were very reluctant to learn how to draw. It’s super sad to see machines already conformed to a bland state of affairs because of the lack of such material. Some aspire to simply just to follow others and not see their potentials. Without art in high schools, there is no thinking out of the box. That frustrated me to no end and pulled me to want to keep going – but that would cost giving up on my game design developments. The damage has already been done and no help in sight to get kids to do art. The class I was teaching had only a mix of technology and art, but not really the fundamentals to drive many. Since the program is transforming into a vocational system, the initial state is still unclear to see it run as this new school year will be the first official run of said system.
So going back to the main reason why I game make is to create a message for humanity. The struggle here to do so is so fierce with making games, that I was truly going to give up that dream. To add on helping the current generation at a very stupid hard changing institution as Boston Public Schools is, there is no way directly. Like many who try to go straight against a fort wall and fail, my new strategy to help the youth is teach them via an external floating option. The prime example is the very thing that got me to learn the tools in the first place; The Computer Clubhouse. The source of my rising to help next gen of folks comes from them. The method how its mission is set is perfectly reasoned and executed. That’s why I wish to work over there to give what I got to the youth. I will not ever try to change a rock without the proper tools. The computer clubhouse is essentially the hammer and the nail that makes the difference versus a vocational system. So I wish to work with the clubhouse one day to really teach them some cool stuff without having to stress them out.
With that said, the next thing right now is to take a vacation away from home and reflect back as well restore my creative energies. Did I mention I need to relax my eye? Yeah, i’ve been suffering a nasty Stye lately for not taking care of myself with germs since i rub my eyes a lot because of me being so intently staring at the screen. So the 2 week vacation will help me recover from all of that stress and allergies.
After that I don’t know yet. We will see.