Gerardo’s Adventures

What is Project: Legend! you say?

Well, Project: Legend! is my new focus.  Its my middle ground between Loquesta.com and A2musik.com.  Both sites only focus on broad ideas and music while Project: Legend! satisfy my lust for myself and everything that has to do with video game geekyness!  I’m gonna open my own Forum about video games and have ultimate freedom to express my innermost video game fantasies! lol  The reason so is because the main forum before I used to go has moved out since from existence and the other solution would be IGN.com, but I sometimes feel not to trail in that direction because I feel more that site to be informative about games and etc than the usual community that Nintendo had before they shutdown theirs.  I just wish to have my own community to which I can cater too.

So Project: Legend! will take notes from Newgrounds.com, The Nintendo Forum, and VGLan.com.  Mind you its just “notes” which I mean I’ll take what has drive them to success and use it to show my original work.  I already have a team of people but now though I need to get a video camera so that I will be able to create the live action indy projects that I want to accomplish.  So the stage can be set for when I will display my works online.  Now though, under what domain name should I use for such project?

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I feel better now that I had a meeting with my team member. Getting all the junky feelings away but I’m still in doubt. I feel that the direction of progress is to slow. I command that we do things a bit faster now that we have the tools to do so. Yet what slows us down considerably is the motivation that we had before. What was once the fire was the whole fact that we had google help us out here but unfortunate events that took place made our biggest ally go against us. I was wondering why, and waited for answers. That’s the reason why I was not so motivated.

Finally the news came my way and I know why our supporter went in doubt with us. It was the reason that we had still was working on our site and we were still experimenting with the tools we had in hand. When the results were in to go the next step, google pulled the plug on us at the last second. That’s why I wasn’t so enthused about the release of our site just before its current form (which isn’t perfect but it is still acceptable). So now what we have is a baby who needs some big attention to nurse it to maturity but we don’t have the food to help us feed it. The team acknowledges it, and thus know how I feel now about it. That’s why I want to create a middle ground solution to this problem. So thus we enter Project: Legend!

But first I have to take a breather before I start giving a new focus on the next best thing. Getting my self up and motivated is the first thing to taking the next step. So that’s why I’m relieved that I’m heading out to work today to get all the junk of my mind. Getting myself organized and ready. This is sort of my preventive against my depressive mindset, so when I’m moving around and thinking about just one objective I feel that my control is restored. Then after the need to create enters my soul again and I go at the canvas once more!

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As my moral is low of this weekend’s business scenario, waking up today not feeling well. Thinking of my dreams that I had this past night (which is many) the one focus was survival. I don’t know but after I saw the movie “I am Legend” something about it I took with me. Now my dreams feel like there is no hope to look forward to things. More so I know its the media running my mind with back to back negative “oh its the end of the world” events on TV. I don’t know why I see that instead of the good stuff but that’s why I turn off the TV so I don’t need to collect those images in my mind.

But see that’s where I feel so low today is for the fact I don’t step out of this small sandbox of mine. Everyday is the same because I make the choice to let it be. Now more than ever so I feel the burn of not going to work and blanking out my mind in labor. My job is spotty and random with the schedule so I need to wait a long time before my next turn to go to work. I love the job but its just not enough time given to me in this season so it leaves me feeling like I’m lost here. So in the meantime I work with my team members furiously to produce something else that will give us income. That is where my doubt lies.

My doubt now is that how is the experiment gonna work after we had a very bad system breakdown? We thought that everything was smooth until I noticed the aggressive behaviors of everyone of my comrades with the system. That shocked me because everything was smooth sailing until this past week where the main source of all of this pulled the plug at the last moment. That’s where the mystery of the problem lies for me. “How? Why?” I ask to myself, so I went to look for the answers. It seems that part due to the involuntarily abusive behaviors of the team members that worked with the experiment of the system caused a complete breakdown of what we were working for. That all means that we won’t be having that extra income fast because of our behaviors of constructing the site itself. Now there is a second chance but that is our last chance. I will only risk it if everything is working according to my conditions and that’s where I have doubt. My account was created to be used 100% legit with the rules and conditions of the system that is helping me to grow. Its not dependency but more a review of what the fuck we did that broke the system before.

That’s now another question in my mind which is, “How is a broken website gonna work if we keep pressing buttons at it? Working to make it better as the intention may be but instead harming our objective?” so I hold my account until I get completely briefed and educated on how to do it right with optimum results.

So how is this all gonna work if I don’t get the site fixed 100% and my moral so low it can just break my confidence about doing all of this in the first place?

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Damn!

Everything was running smooth until one of my team members went trigger happy on overworking the site.  Then Poof! I’m right now struggling to find a solution to the latest problem.  Everything was done until up till now, where I guess I have to delay the Relaunch of the site. Shit! Shit! Shit!

. .. This means more I have to be Missing in Action for more time and more time on the DAMN COMPUTER!!! ARG!!!

… Perfection is my name, and if it’s not perfectly how I demand it to be then I must redo. I was so close though, but I guess the release has to be delayed just a bit.  The unfortunate part I have to do is repost all the information again.  I don’t want the site to be bugged out while people go on, I want it to feel like a million bucks. So for that reason (if I can’t find solution B), I must redo.

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