😢

… Yeah Um, I’ve been very silent here even though I promised to keep writing ✍️, I stopped because there was too much stuff happening at my end. I really don’t know where to start.

Damn, I really also didn’t want to write anything anymore as well. I discovered many who come here and take things out of proportions or take my stuff I write here too seriously or simply criticize my way of using grammar. This is why I do video blogs instead to hide things in my own code and not to put so much pressure on myself. What transpired last year was something that I cannot still believe it happened.

Let me just call it my own personal Armageddon occurred last year that took basically my childhood home and family ties into oblivion. Only now I hold for dear life all memories of mine and my family’s past but cut ties with my 2 siblings after the fact. The pain that I went through with them was and still is too much for me. To think that I was coerced to sell something really sentimental to me by pretty much disrespecting my own space first and second trashing records of our achievements, and even worse throwing my stuff out the balcony without my consent— it is why my spirit broke and realize they don’t care that so much was sacrificed to obtain that place. That there were so many options open before going deep in terminating what was once a happy place we all grew up in.

This event last year pushed me to put everything I was working on on hold. I was so frustrated about that too! I couldn’t finish my animation project at all in where it involves using my house as the setting. So now I have to work everything into CGI. Everything went out of wack and I never felt so distressed in my entire life.

The worse part from it all was that everyone went up against me about it. My long time friends conspired against me with it and truly i felt defeated with the stranglehold that my siblings had over me. Emotionally manipulative all over the board, including where I used to work. I felt like I couldn’t trust anyone anymore. This gave me reason to stop writing on my blog and making anything about myself. It was really rough time- it was truly heartbreaking.

I’m still crushed by it all. This whole thing is beyond the feelings I had 2 years prior. It was like every year it just escalated up to the climax that transpired last year. I feel is all my fault for it all happening. Yeah I am miserable but mostly because I’m with bad company that don’t appreciate me or have a superficial link with me. True colors came out like death riding on a black horse last year, and seriously why I don’t talk to my brother anymore. He died when he left to the army. The person who came back wasn’t recognizable and out of the person who I knew before.

This is why it felt like a nightmare every damn day last year since my brother and my coworker went up to throw away my dressers and a couple of my things without consent. It was like a warped out reality. I rather get shot in the head than to have gone thru all of that. It shattered me and it was once again a play on what had transpired before with my siblings.

This is the gunk of stuff I want to get off my chest before getting on with showcasing new stuff and moving on, the silver lining that comes off from the dumpster fire 🔥 that all of this was for me. To think that the pandemic in 2020 was just the beginning, it then went personally straight to my heart and soul a year later. I felt mentally exhausted and I couldn’t deal with shit anymore. I really felt like killing myself. If it wasn’t for my gf being there, I simply wouldn’t known what to do with myself and such circumstance… (probably fight and then kill myself)

Fast forward ⏩ to today— and we have me now using the same cash I got from the sale to get my creative stuff going, first my 3D printing stuff—

Wakko Test print (Print #12)

So the idea 💡 here is to march on what I’ve started 2 years ago with Tribus Fabula project by incorporating 3D printed subjects for animation in various parts under that umbrella ☂ of the project. Also use this opportunity to sell the characters on an online storefront. My choice is opening Etsy store account and for now, to catch folks attention, I’m doing fan art first, and then develop my own models and action figures once popularity grows with my works. After that jump back into game dev again and I’ll be assembling a team for the next dev run.

Anyway, It has been over a year now that the event took place and I’m in a good stable situation at the moment. The figures I’m printing and other things I’ll disclose in much more details in their own designated relative web spaces (Mariolegend.com, TribusFabula.com. DarkZeta.com). The first phase and second phases are the hardest to execute because I need so much work to be done before accomplishing them– As continuing the story of what transpired last year that pretty much put everything on hold and broke my heart, I’ll be making a G-Chronicles special edition series that i left off from 2019 to 2021 separately but for now I won’t get to that because i’m focused on moving on and also I feel is best to keep those things behind a gated wall. I’m gonna relaunch my patreon again for 3D prints and 3D models for folks to get much more specially made shit from me on as well get personally deep with content that I rather just keep away from posting here.